Respect

Respect for elders is what we are taught from the days of childhood. This is a mandatory thing in someone’s social life. This impersonates your personality most. Or in other words your respect towards others reciprocates who you are and how you are. This is the feeling, which enlightens your heart, purifies your mind and presents yourself as a good individual.

The reason for this write up is that someone told me to express my thoughts on Respect, which I failed to manage in time. Now I am feeling the guilt of the act, which I cared least. Later I came to know he was trying to judge me as an individual. When the time came, he told there was a big surprise for you if you had completed it. I got the surprise, but there was a lesser amount of joy experienced by me. The things which we get without struggle are less enjoyable as compared to the things which we acquire by our strengths or rather capabilities.

The feeling of giving respect to others does not mean to not keeping up with others. But if you have anything that should be expressed to your respected ones you have to present it in such a way that the target (in this case your respected ones) should not feel that you are crossing your boundaries.

In our childhood days we were told that if you give respect then only you will get respect.

Respect is commanded…

Not demanded.

Respect for others comes from the good will they have gained in your heart. The respect, as mentioned by one of my friends Fahad Thakur, may be of many types viz. respecting elders, religion (respecting the religious), Knowledge (respecting the teachers), status (Head, sarpanch) and such.

For me the respect is respect. Because it is coming from your heart(Dil Se). If it is not from heart it is just an imitation of respect. Not the real one. If we can think to the extent of the horizons made by "Respect", we would be at a place where your respect is commanded by you. And I think I am yet to reach there...

To me respect is not only for myself... It is more towards respecting others.

Let us take a case here. I meet an unidentified individual. No matter where and when. The thought process starts and I think “is it worth giving respect to him/her?” This is the time when one sows the seed of "Command" for respect. Normally people are judged by their attire, then by the communication skills and then by knowledge. (This could be different in other contexts.) Even I do the same. I start by humble conversation. I notice the response. The expectation would be the same as said by me. I do get the response with the same magnitude. Then it is my turn to divert the conversation to the topic of interest of both of us. This will show the communication skill of the individual. Depending upon the topic it is decided who the knowledgeable person is.

Be it anyone. But the person looking into the knowledge of the other will be making space for “goodwill” of that person in his own heart. The more goodwill I generate for the other person, there will be more amount of respect towards him.

This indicates that the respect comes from knowledge. This is a different line of thought altogether. Let us come at it later. But, the respect would demand the person to be dominative. The dominance does not mean “by hook or crook”. This is when it is exhibited that he/she is worth respecting.

The cycle for respect continues in itself and in everyone. People are respected by others, and the same people are also giving respect to others. Now I say, I am in a position of Mr. Bill Gates, and I want everyone to respect me. But knowing that I have not of the worth I would not be getting what Mr. Gates is getting. But if I am also having the knowledge at par with Mr. Gates, I would definitely be respected.

The boss of the company is not just a boss but your controller also. That is, he controls your actions. But if you do not respect him in terms of knowledge, you would respect him because of his position. But here also the role of goodwill needs to be played. This goodwill comes from the behavior and manner in which you people communicate. The general capabilities of a person would be exhibited from his actions. The boss would know your strengths and weaknesses, but in stead of highlighting those to you, he utilizes those. And your part lies in working as per the instructions. The essence of whole thing is when your actions suffice to your boss’s expectations; you gain a chunk of goodwill in his heart. Otherwise, there would be cinches in the relation and lesser amount of respect for each other. But relationship will continue to last, as a professional relationship. There is no presence of true respect from heart.

There is more to come yet.